Kitten's Talk Show
by Camowolf7
Summary: just one word, funny, you'll laugh so hard until you cry for mercy, this show is just plain awkward, my spelling sucks, i don't care
1. Default Chapter

Kitten's Talk show

Chapter 1- Heroes

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, Trigun, Teen Titans, nor Cowboy Bebop, I don't own Arnold Swartzineger, but since he is a real person, I can make him my slave, Mwahahahahahaha, my disclaimer will only be in this chapter

Beastboy: Dude, one time at band camp I like saw a bear, and I was like "ah, a bear", and the bear was like "ah, Beastboy", and I like threw an apple at it, and it was like "thanks", and I was like "your welcome", and a man came by and he was like "ah, a bear", and the bear was like "ah, a man" and the man like ran away and I was like "cool", and I like said like, like 14 times

Kitten: ok Beastboy, I don't think we want to hear about your mindless escapades

Beastboy: uh, Kitten, the camera's rolling

Kitten: Oh, hello and welcome to Kitten's Talk Show, for our first few guests today we have Arnold Swartzineger, Inuyasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Shippo, and Kouga, so Arnold tell us about yourself

Arnold: I am Arnold Swartzineger, I shall terminate you

Kitten: Naraku, can we get an evil laugh over here

Naraku: kukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukuku, happy now

Kitten: yes, I'm a very happy girl, go on Arnold

Arnold: as you can see, I am related to Kouga, we both have hairy legs

Kouga: I do not have hairy legs, I shave

Inuyasha: Paahahahahahahahahahaaha, now Kagome will never be your woman

Kouga: ya wanna fight mutt-face

Inuyasha: bring it on ya mangy wolf

Kagome: Inuyasha, sit boy, seriously, what am I going to do with you

( Inuyasha's face goes pounding into the ground)

Miroku: Kouga, don't you find that a little girly

Sango: ya, are ya gay or something- PERVERT!

( Miroku gropes Sango, Sango slaps Miroku as hard as she can which sends Miroku flying across the room unconscious)

Shippo: Idiot, he will never learn

Kitten: OOOOOKKKKK, well Arnold, worry about that, please continue

Arnold: well, also like Kouga, I wear a skirt

Kitten: and when the wind blows, how des that skirt stay down, well, now for our break with Vash the Stampede's cooking show.

( set change to kitchen with Vash standing there with a stupid smile on his face)

Hi, I'm Vash the Stamped, and this is my cooking show, today we will be making donuts, I love donuts, I really love donuts, I really, really love donuts, I really, really, really, love donuts

Beastboy: uh, Vash, you have 5 minutes till the end of break so I sudjest you, STOP TELLING US HOW MUCH YOU LIKE DONUTS

Vash: oh, ok, so you take really soft cookies, a gun which is used for making the hole, and ( throws cookie in air then shoots cookie with gun, Vash then takes bite out of donut) yumm, tastes like.........gun.....powder, back to you Kitten, love an peace, love and pe-

( set change)

Kitten: welcome back, Arnold, Inuyasha and co. have left the building so we have new guests, they are Robin, Starfire, Cyborg, and Raven

( Robin and Starfire walk on stage)

Kitten: oh Robby-poo, your Kitten has arrived, Meow!!

Starfire: why must you insist on calling him poo

Kitten: Robby-poo, come and give your little Kitten a kiss

Starfire: he does not except your invitation

( Starfire's eyes glow green)

Robin: calm down Star

( Cyborg and Raven walk on stage)

Raven: isn't that the daughter of that moth guy we sent to jail the other day

Cyborg: ya, I think she's a moth freak, haha

Crazy Black Lady in audience: Go Cyborg, your so tall and musculaaaaaaar

Kitten: shut it, or I will have daddy come and hurt you

Beastboy: he Raven, wanna watch me eat a truck load of tofu

Raven: I think not, apparently, last time you threw up

Beastboy: heh, heh, oh ya

Kitten: Beastboy, stop talking to the guests, you're the camera man

Beastboy: oh ya, I forgot

Cyborg: hey BB, since when have you been a camera man haha

Beastboy: shut up Cy!

Cyborg: no you shut up

Beastboy: no you

Cyborg: no you

Beastboy: no you

Kitten: un fortunately we ran out of time, Spike how about you come and end the show for me, I'm kinda busy ( runs after Robin) Robby-poo why don't you come and give me a hug

( Starfire knocks kitten unconscious)

( Spike walks on stage)

Spike: see you next time on Kitten's Talk Show, if you live long enough to see it heh, heh, ( makes hang gun) Bang!

Beastboy: help he's gonna kill me, Spike's gonna kill me

( camera falls and turns upside down, screen turns to fuzz, Kitten can be heard in back round)

Kitten Beastboy, you idiot, why the heck did you do that, get over here, I'm gonna kill you

( screen goes black)


	2. Chapter 2 Villains

Hey everyone, guess what, Frankie's back, thats me, those of you who are thinking i'm a boy, well your wrong, Frankie is short for Francesca, its Italian, ok so if you people are getting confused, i'm gonna tell who is crew and what they do, yay, lets have a party, if you put liquor in the punch bowl, i swear, i'll hunt you down, and you wont be able to tell people how you did it because you won't be alive, ok, here is a little diagram showing you who does what and what show they are in.

characters-job-show

Kitten-Host-Teen Titans

Beastboy- Cameraman-Teen Titans

Naraku-Special Effects Dude-Inuyasha

Vash the Stampede-Cook-Trigun

Spike-Dude who ends show-Cowboy Bebop

Crazy Black Lady in audience- person who thinks they are at the Jerry Springer show- My Imagination ( my imagination is not a show, if you think it is, your an idiot and you have no right to live, thank you very much)

The disclaimer was in the 1st chapter

Beastboy: so Kitten, wanna got out on Saturday night

Kitten: Beastboy, I told you, Robby-poo is my one and only true love

Naraku&Vash: earth to Beastboy and Kitten, the show's about to start

Kitten: oh, sorry, Beastboy, get to work or i will put you to sleep dog style

Beastboy: ok, ok, don't have cow

Kitten: I'll make you eat a cow

Beastboy: no, no, that's ok ( whispers) How Barbaric

Kitten: I heard that, get to work or i will cut your head off and shove it down your throat, ( tilts head to the side) wait, that didn't sound right, how do you put your head down your throat when you don't have a throat once you cut your head o-

Beastboy: ok, shut up, the camera's rolling

Kitten: Hello, and welcome to Kitten's Talk Show, before we go on with the show, I have to tell you that we will be having surprise guests, they are so big of a surprise that i don't even know who they are or when they are coming, so, heh, heh, no comment, for the beginning of our show, our guests will be Sesshomaru, Kagura, and even our own sound effects dud, Naraku, and if you didn't find out already our show today will be on villains, Naraku can you give an evil laugh or 2

Naraku: kukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukukuku

Beastboy: dude, who goes kukuku when they laugh, its unsanitary

Kitten: Beastboy shut up

Beastboy: I don't wanna

Kitten: do ya wanna get fired

Beastboy: no

Kitten: then shut up

Beastboy: NO

Kitten: then your fired

Beastboy: WHAT, I don't wanna be fired, please don't fire me, I'll be good, I swear, and I'll stop hitting on you too

Kitten: Fine

( Sesshomaru, Kagura, and Naraku walk on stage)

Crazy Black Lady in Audience: whoo, Sesshomaru take your shirt off, take it off, take it off, come on everybody cheer with me

( cricketts chirping)

Crazy Blck Lady in Audience: why aren't you people cheering

Sesshomaru: stop it you useless human

Naraku: do I really have to be here

Kitten: yes

Naraku: why

Kitten: because you'll get fired if you leave without my permition

Naraku: oh

Kagura: ( flirtatiously) so Sesshomaru, have you thought baout that saving me from Naraku thing

Sesshomaru: no

Kagura: ( whiny) oh

Kitten: oooookkkkkk, so Naraku, tell us about your job

Naraku: I hate my job, especially you , you arrogant, self-centerd, egotistical, j-

Kitten: ok Naraku, shut up and get back to work

Naraku: humph

Kitten: so Sesshomaru, there is a question that everyone is asking, why do you wear makeup, are you gay?

Sesshomaru: what nerve

( Sesshomaru takes out Tokijin and attacks Kitten, but gets thrown across the room by a barrier surrounding kitten)

Sesshomaru: what the h-

Kitten: hahaha, this is a barrier I had Naraku concoct for me for simple things like this

Kagura: Sesshomaru is not gay, he's going out with me

Sesshomaru: NO I'M NOT

Kitten: going out witha revenge freak like you can certainly turn a man gay

Kagura: take that back or I'll rip you ro shreds

Kitten: no you won't, and you can't, remember, barrier

Sesshomaru: I AM NOT GAY YOU WORTHLESS HUMAN

Kitten: I am not a human,..... daddy's part moth

(Sesshomaru will now become fluffy because i am tired of saying his name so many damn times)

Fluffy: oh, so your a freak like Inuyasha

Kitten: Shut it, ok before i go mid-evil on Fluffy's head, w are going to have a break with Vash the Stampede's cooking show

( set change)

Vash: Hi, I'm Vash and we ar going to make Swiss cheese, hmm, i wonder if Swiss cheese is really Swiss...

Beastboy: go on with the show

Vash: oh, sorry, first you need a block of cheese and a gun, and ( shoots cheese about 12 times then holds it up) Swiss cheese made with authentic gun powder heh, heh

(set change)

Kitten: welcome back, we have new guests, Slade and Cinderblock, and I got a hint that our surprise guests will be coming soon, yay, i wonder who it is, hmmm, soooo, Cinderblock, what do you do when your not being a nuisance

Cinderblock: MWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kitten: don't tell me you can't talk

Cinderblock:MWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Kitten: umm, Naraku, a little help here

( Cindrblock falls through a trap door)

Kitten: thanks Naraku, Mwahahahahahahaha

Naraku: Kitten, don't try to laugh evilly, your bad at it

Kitten: shut up, so Slade, why ya always pickin on my Robby-poo

Slade: well Kitten, we are very much alike, very much alike indeed, you see, I am related to Robin

( Robin and Starfire come runnig onto the stage)

Robin: how are we related

Slade: Robin, I am your father

Robin: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! really?

Slade: no not really you idiot

Beastboy: haha, Robin got tricked

Kitten: shut up Beastboy, Robby-poo, are you my surprise guest

Robin: as much as i don't want to say it, yes

Kitten: ( sqeals) Robby-poo whens our wedding

Robin: wha-?

Starfire: ( in anger) I do not remember Robin making the proposal of bondage to you

Robin: What she said

(Kitten attacks Starfire but gets thrown to the ground by Starfire's star blasts, Robin walks up and knocks Kitten out)

Beastboy:ok, um, I guess i have to do this, Spike wanna come and end the show

Spike: See you next time on Kitten's Talk Show, if there is a next time, Naraku can we get an evil laugh over here

Naraku: kukukukukkukukukukukukukukukukukuku, there, go crazy

Spike: (makes hand gun) bang!

Beastboy: ok Spike, stop doing that, that really freaks me out

( Spiek points hand gun at Beastboy)

Spike: Bang!

Beastboy: Ah, somebody help me, Robin help me, Starfire help me, Slade help me, well maby not Slade, but somebody halp me

( screen goes Black)


End file.
